To all my loved ones
So this is it. My last
post. I remember creating this blog looking for the most ridiculous
name I could possibly find. (So it ended up being American Sauerkraut even though I think sauerkraut is the devils spawn and utterly despise it.) That was more than 12 months ago. It
would be a huge understatement if I'd say that “time flies”. The
months that I got to spend in Wichita/Burk were a true blessing. I'm
not saying that they were perfect. But hey, like my true idol Hannah
Montana used to say “Nobodys perfect. I gotta work it. Again and
again till I get it right.” (A moment of silence please.) What
I'm trying to say is that it's not about "how perfect“ something
is but what you learn from it and what you make out of it. So with this post
I just wanna give you a short summary of what I learned while I was
having the most beautiful but also chaotic time of my life.
Over a year ago I got a
very very special call. Apparently there are 3 types of calls in this
world.
There are the famous „how am I gonna hang up as fast as I
can“-calls which are basically connections over the telephone
between an extremely chatty and an annoyed grumpy cat party. Most of
the time those two „parties“ are related or married. Or
someone is trying to sell you a really expensive dishwasher that
falls apart after only a month and leaves you sad and dishwasherless.
#2 is the kind of calls
you want to get. Like when you want your best friend to tell you how
their summer is going. Or when you actually like your relatives and
wonder how they're doing.
And then there is #3. The
kind of calls you're dying to get. Like when your representative of
the German parliament calls you to tell you that you're getting a
full scholarship that's gonna make all your dreams come true. Yes,
number 3 is definitely my favorite. After 2 months of waiting and
nervously biting my nails I finally had the result. I was going to
live in the United States of America for a whole 10 months. Some
people might not know bout that but an exchange year is as expensive
as buying yourself a shit ton of chicken nuggets. (20thousand to be exact)
After two more
months they found a local coordinator for me and I knew that my
destination would be....Texas.
“Everything but
Texas” I used to tell my mother when we were talking about my
dreams and expectations long before I even applied for the scholarship by the German Bundestag so when she found out what state I'd be
living in she got a little worried. I however was so excited that I
totally forgot about all my prejudice. I'm still not a horse person
and not a big fan of fast food but Texas is literally my second home.
Not only because I found a second family but also because Texas
freakin rocks. The people are not only
a lot nicer but also a lot more relaxed. Life seems so much easier
over there. When I got back to Germany the first thing I noticed was
how rude people were on the other side of the world. No one says “How
are you today” or “It's my pleasure” (a reference to my fav
place in the world so I guess I kinda am a fast food person lmao)
when you ask for lemonade. Everyone is in a hurry. You can consider
yourself happy if someone smiles at you because showing emotions
seems to be too much of an effort. When I said “Everything but
Texas” I was superficial as can be. But I'd say that being
judgmental was one of my worst personality traits anyways. So it
doesn't really surprise me.
At the beginning of the year I was way
too convinced of myself and everything that wasn't right for me wasn't supposed to be right for anyone. But the world is full of different
opinions, different life styles and different people that are all
perfectly imperfect in their very own way. And that's what makes our
world so incredibly beautiful. Texas opened my eyes to the world. I
know that sounds kinda cheese but I feel so much more mature and so
much more like I'm being myself. It's not that I wasn't myself 11 months ago
when I started my journey. But I feel like I made a lot of progress.
And there are so many people that I want to thank for everything
they've done for me. It's not always the obvious things that help you
the most to grow. Sometimes you have to be forced to stand up for
yourself by dealing with situations that make you feel like the world
is just too complicated and you're unable to cope with it. But there
were so many people that gave me more than I could ever put into
words. Love, compassion, honesty, respect, support, attention, focus,
the freedom to be myself, a voice of inspiration and
positivity, a hug when I needed it the most.
I feel truly and deeply
blessed to have received such amazing gifts. All of the people I met
during this year will forever be in my heart and always find a friend
when they need one.
I got to see so many
parts of the US and don't get me wrong San Francisco was AMAZING
but Texas is more than just a place to me. Do you know that feeling when
you get home and open the door, take off your shoes and
lay down on the couch like a fat baby potato? That's how I felt
whenever I got back to Texas from my trips. It's just home.
And I can be my fat baby potato self. If that's not a reason to
celebrate I don't know what is.
I
learned to love people the way they are. I learned that body size and
clothing styles should be just as interesting to people as shoe
umbrellas and string cheese. (Which means not at all so in case
you're a sucker for string cheese sorry not sorry) (the same goes for
shoe umbrellas)
I
learned how to love myself even though I still think I'm a little bit
weird but hey, aren't we all in our very own way. (Be honest. Yes, yes you are.)
I even
rode a horse once during my time in Texas which is a really big step
for me since I'm afraid of heights. And I went to a “real
Burkburnett rodeo”. So I'm basically Texan. And I'll always be.
Because once you're Texan there's no goin back. (Am I right y'all)
This
year has changed me in so many different ways that it's quite hard to
give a real summary. I've only been back in good ol' Germany for a
month so I might find some more things that aren't the same to me.
But I'll definitely come visit soon. I'm already saving up money so
it shouldn't take long until my Texas family sees my face again.
Until then y'all stay safe and send me some Reese's. I'm so thankful
for this whole experience. I'm thankful for the nights that turned
into days. All the talks we had. The moments we shared. I'm thankful
for my family/best friends that I miss more than anything else in the
world. I'm thankful for my amazing theatre family. The XC and track meets I got
to participate in. All the good food I ate. All the gym days I had to
have afterwards. All the times I confused words or made a fool of
myself because in the end we all had a good laugh. I'm so thankful
for the people I met in Choir and the great experiences that came
with them. I'm thankful for my favorite teacher whose name I can't
say but she's on my Facebook so she might read this and the thought
gets me so excited you guys. I'm thankful for my lovely church group
and my incredible youth group leader. I'm thankful for each and every
adventure. I'm thankful for the struggles, the anticipation, the
happiness and the joy. But most of all I'm thankful for my good fate.
Because without fate this wouldn't have happened. And I don't even
wanna think about missing all of this for a Plancks time (3.3
x 10-44
sec which is apparently the smallest unit of time there is)
Forever
and always,
Annabell
___________________________________________
An der Stelle möchte ich mich außerdem bei jedem bedanken, der mich auf meiner Reise begleitet und regelmäßig reingeschaut hat, um zu sehen, ob ein neuer Post da war. Ich hoffe es hat euch nur halb so viel Spaß gemacht American Sauerkraut zu lesen wie mir das Schreiben Spaß gemacht hat. I love you all dearly. Have a great day.
♥
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